In my body, mind and spirit, I am feeling September. Even though there is not yet a seasonal change here in Belize, I feel an internal shift. I know that soon it will become drier, the temperature will turn slightly cooler, and the season for mangoes and avocados will end. I am also aware of how I continue to experience New York time; the expectations of fall, the return to school, and the transition from late summer still live in me. Combined with the intense energy of Saturday’s full moon in Pisces, which I am still processing, I find myself in a slightly restless and subtly anxious mood. I am taking a lot in. Knowing that this is passing through, I am at once engaging this space and surrendering to it.
My spiritual practice has shifted as well, as I adjust to the energies within and around me. I have been here for almost three months, and while I feel very settled in some ways, I feel less so in others. I have lost ten pounds since I’ve been here, as I am experiencing less stress and the healing nourishment of sunshine and fresh fruits and vegetables. Being closer to nature is wonderful, as is having the time and space to relax, rest, and live at my own pace. At the same time, I am still navigating the confusing process of getting work authorization, which is unclear and somewhat bureaucratic, and trying to balance my own sense of urgency with the way things are done here in Belize (folks are not pressed).
I continue to look to my morning routine to provide grounding and centering as I start my day. Here are the elements I’m incorporating as of late:
Tea. For the past three weeks I have been drinking organic green tea instead of coffee in the morning. I hadn’t actually planned on doing this. I was given some delicious tea by Jamaul and just got into it. Even though it still has caffeine, I noticed how much less jittery I felt, and realized that I had basically been drinking a whole French press of coffee by myself every morning. Yeah, not helpful in taking the edge off. And green tea is good for you and stuff. I love the ritual of preparing tea and find it very grounding.
Tarot. I am still working with the New Orleans Voodoo Tarot deck and loving it. I usually work with the cards while I am waiting for the water to boil for tea. For a while I was shuffling the deck every day and pulling one card to reflect on, but lately I’ve been pulling a card without shuffling to better acquaint myself with the deck. I also switched it up so that I’m not just pulling the same cards over and over and working with the same themes. The cards have been super helpful in focusing my energy, and the deck really resonates with me as I have been practicing elements of Voodoo for years.
Journaling. I’ve been journaling a lot lately as so much was coming through around the full moon. I’ve been keeping a journal since I was a kid and had stopped writing for a while at the beginning of the year, probably because I was feeling overwhelmed and having trouble finding the language to describe what I was experiencing. Since I moved to Belize I have made the effort to write regularly, and have rediscovered how journaling around my experience actually guides me to find the language. It’s reconnected me with my love of writing and led me to keep this blog going. I feel myself returning to a more regular writing practice. It’s also been really important for me to have a place to express and process my thoughts and feelings about the move. Sometimes it feels like everything is happening all at once. Journaling helps me to pause and tune in and just be still for a minute.
Yoga. This morning I did my first sun salutation since I moved to Belize (don’t judge). After waking up feeling anxious I decided to get over myself, pull out my dusty-ass yoga mat from the closet, and get up in that tadasana. It immediately brought me into my body, which is what I’ve really been needing since I’m so often in my head. I’ve been practicing yoga on and off for years, and just those five minutes this morning were restorative and inspired me to get back into a regular practice. Maybe the gentle discipline is what I need right now.
I’m still feeling the surge of creative energy generated by the full moon, and am trying to use and carry that into this next phase of…. whatever’s next. That’s where I am right now, on the verge of something. I am having wonderful ideas and acting on them, initiating connections with people, really committing to developing and brainstorming and following through. I’m more excited and activated than I’ve been in a long time. Which makes it all the more important for me to have a practice that grounds and centers me amidst the beautiful chaos.